yesterday, i was passed a torch.
three minutes have passed since i typed that previous sentence. i’ve been sitting here, trying to figure out where i could go with that metaphor. i think perhaps i should just get on with it. so here we go.
dammit, i got distracted again. first, i was trying to think of torch metaphors without sounding like Harvey Firestein. when i finally decided to get on with it, i remembered that i should make a salad. i decided that it should be the perfect salad. it was. nevermind that it came from a bag. my other options included a trip to KFC, so i think i did pretty good opting for a bag salad.
ok, now i’m back and ready to focus on the task at hand.
it goes a little something like this:
1. I will write 10 “interesting” things about myself.
2. I’ll tag one person because my tagger only tagged one person although i guess if you follow tagging convention you should tag 10 of your friends. but i shan’t be doing that.
3. If you’ve been tagged, you do your own list and tag more people. (Unless you don’t want to, and no one has been pressuring you to make a new blog entry for, like, eight months.)
1. i smell the milk in the carton prior to every use. yes, prior to EVERY use. let’s say i have a bowl of cereal, and then i go back for seconds. i will smell that milk in the carton before splashing it all over my second helping. people, i’m not taking any chances.
2. i’ve been trying to delete some of my myspace friends but i am scared of confrontation (both verbal and physical). basically, i’ve been deleting people who can’t call/write me and those who were born with smaller biceps than me. (i’ve been having some trouble finding any who fall into the latter category.)
3. i dropped out of college after three and a half years. i blame the Spanish. and their tricky language.
4. i’m afraid to fly.
5. i enjoy creating to-do lists of chores that have already been completed. it is very satisfying to check off a bunch of tasks at once. makes me feel very productive.
6. i like the smell of skunks. not enough to warrant placing it at number 6 on a list of 10 things about me, but the window is open right now and i can smell a skunk and i sort of like it and i totally lack focus and sometimes that forces me off on a tangent. this wine is delicious. it is sort of strange that $8 wine would be from a winemaker’s “private selection”. what do they do with their “public selection”? use it to clean automobile engines? sterilize veterinary instruments?
7. in college, i had a job selling “swamp cooler” air conditioners via telephone. i guess they are large contraptions that sit on your roof. i’m not sure. i believe i had that job for a month or two… impressive, since i never sold anything.
8. Arrested Development was the best television show ever made. that being said, i’m a big fan of the concept of television (watching people interact with each other without them being able to interact with you, and viewing images of far away lands and the goings ons there without having to take a bumpy plane ride) and will watch anything. except Little House on the Prairie.
9. when someone says “call me at 9:30 thursday morning”, i will email them at 9:30 on thursday morning. if they give me a telephone number and instruct me to use it to call them, i will send them a text message. i do not like talking to people, or rather, i do not like when people interrupt me as i am talking to them. i do enjoy speaking on the radio, as i can jam a run-on sentence into the ear of the listener without any unnecessary feedback.
10. as i mentioned earlier, i have a short attention span and have a difficult time focusing and buckling down. as i am trying to think of the 10th thing about me, i am getting distracted by the word “buckling”. it doesn’t look right. this happens to me a lot. i start looking at a word and it starts looking back at me and contorting itself or something and then i start to wonder if my ability to spell has atrophied, along with my handwriting, with the advent of the computer. also, i can’t punctuate properly and i never capitalize and i don’t remember when i’m supposed to use a semi-colon. now that i think about it, i haven’t used a semi-colon since high school. so did i just make a number ten? i think i did.
Tag, you’re it: Karl Rothenberger.